


Fear Is Dark (But My Love Is A Lantern)

by AshesStarsAndRedStringsOfFate



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Kidfic (technically), Makeovers, Overstimulation, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-06-30 18:18:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15757155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshesStarsAndRedStringsOfFate/pseuds/AshesStarsAndRedStringsOfFate
Summary: Thomas has always had an… interesting relationship with the different facets of his personality. That relationship is tested, however, when he wakes up one morning to find his four main Sides permanently manifested and that he now has to care for them. Well, this should be… interesting. Headcanons galore! Rated for Virgil's mouth (he swears a LOT).





	1. Like Coins in a Fountain

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my first fic for Sanders Sides, so please let me know if you have any tips to help me improve! I love this series so much, and I decided it was finally time to write something for it. 
> 
> Just so you know, here are the main headcanons I have for each Side that will probably come into play at some point in the story, as well as the (physical) ages of each. Also note that I changed the appearances of the Sides a little; there aren’t five Thomas Sanders running around Florida in this! 
> 
> Logan: age 9, Asperger’s, has a stutter and a slight lisp, texture issues, overactive senses, needs fidget cubes and puzzles, loves nail polish, freckles, black hair and blue eyes  
> Roman: age 14, ADHD, loves wearing makeup and nail polish, speaks all the Romance languages, red hair and dark red eyes  
> Patton: age 16, cries easily for every strong emotion, first Side to manifest in Thomas, freckles, sandy blonde hair and blue eyes  
> Virgil: age 6, secretly finds comfort in plushies and Rubix cubes, plays the ukulele, needs music with white noise and ambient lighting to sleep, loves nail polish, freckles, black hair and violet eyes
> 
> Thanks guys, and on with the story!

It all started out as a normal day for Thomas. He woke up sometime around noon, wandered downstairs for a cup of coffee, ate a light breakfast of toast with Crofter’s, wandered back upstairs to shower and get dressed, and spent the rest of the day working on video ideas. He ordered a pizza for dinner sometime around sunset, and ate while working in order to maximize efficiency. He finally settled on an idea for the next video after his third slice of pizza and got to work on a script, excitement bubbling in his gut as he worked. All in all, this was normal.

 

What wasn’t normal, however, was the rolling in his stomach and the pounding headache that developed around nine at night. He figured it was nothing, just a sign that he had eaten a bit too much and that maybe he had been staring at a screen for far too long. That was fine, he could handle it. Unfortunately, the pain and discomfort worsened as the night progressed, until it finally got to the point that Thomas had to close the laptop because even on the lowest setting for light emission, it still burned his retinas as if he was staring directly into the sun. Thomas dug the heels of his hands into his sockets and tried to breathe through the nausea, to no avail.

 

“What the heck is happening to me?” Thomas breathed, swallowing the saliva that had been accumulating in his mouth. At that moment, the pain in his temples spiked, and Thomas cried out in pain. He curled in on himself in a futile attempt to find relief. His vision suddenly whited out, and when he came to, he found that the headache was gone as well as the stomach pain. Unfortunately, something was still not right.

 

Four bodies were sprawled in a heap on the floor in front of his couch. Groans emerged from the pile, and Thomas blinked in confusion. How had these people gotten into his house? They didn’t seem threatening, but seriously, what was going on?

 

The first one to scramble out of the pile was a young teen, probably around 13 or 14, with wavy red hair falling into their dark red eyes. _Okay_ , Thomas thought, _red eyes aren’t exactly normal._ Beyond the red eyes, however, they appeared to be a normal human. They wore what had probably been a Disney prince costume at some point but had since been decorated with golden thread and emblems. A scarlet sash was pulled across their chest, and they were glancing around the room in confusion. Their eyes eventually landed on Thomas, and they widened in response.

 

“Oh, heck…” they breathed. Thomas blinked in confusion. That sounded like… a younger version of himself, only with a different inflection on the words.

 

“Roman, what’s going on?” another voice that sounded way too much like Thomas’s for comfort spoke up. This person had just pushed themselves off of the other two figures, both of which appeared to still be unconscious and much smaller than the other two. The new speaker appeared to be around 16 and had sandy blonde curls that stuck up every which way and baby blue eyes that were framed by thin wire glasses that rested on a delicate nose that was splattered with freckles. They wore a light blue T-shirt and crisp jeans with a sweatshirt or a cardigan tied around their neck. Strange style for a teen to have, but hey, Thomas had seen odder dress senses before. This one’s eyes found Thomas’s much faster than the first one’s had, and the small smile instantly dropped off their face.

 

“Oh… never mind, I see what’s going on,” they said. Thomas finally managed to kick his brain into gear and opened his mouth.

 

“Uh… not that this meeting isn’t nice or anything, but who are you guys, and how’d you get into my house?” Thomas asked, sitting up on the couch. The two teens looked at each other and seemed to have a silent debate with their eyes. Finally, the red-head turned to Thomas and stuck out a hand in introduction.

 

“My name is Roman, and this is my friend Patton,” the red-head offered. Thomas took the hand and shook it while shooting a friendly wave to the blonde, Patton, who waved back. “As for how we got in here,” Roman continued, “we are actually parts of you that have somehow managed to be manifested into the world. Do you have any idea how that may have happened?” Thomas blinked in confusion before bursting out laughing. Roman frowned and glanced back at Patton, looking extremely insulted. Thomas finally managed to get a hold of himself and turned back to face the two teenagers.

 

“Wait, so you’re trying to tell me that you two, and also presumably the two unconscious kids on the floor, are parts of me? That– do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?” Thomas asked, trying to get his breathing under control. Roman pushed themself to their feet and stalked over to Thomas, glaring down at him.

 

“I’m not crazy, Thomas, and neither are you. I have no idea how this happened either,” Roman answered through gritted teeth. Thomas snorted, and Roman growled a bit in response.

 

“Okay, you know what? I’ll prove it!” And with that, Roman reached forward and roughly grabbed Thomas’s hand. Thomas opened his mouth to protest, but before he could, memories and feelings started to flash through his brain. Memories of stage performances, stories, and romance flashed across his brain at an almost dizzying speed. Roman only held Thomas’s hand for a few seconds, but that was more than enough to leave Thomas gasping for air as soon as Roman let go. Roman grinned down at him triumphantly, their eyebrow quirked in challenge.

 

“Oh my God, you’re telling the truth,” Thomas gasped. Roman nodded before glancing back at Patton.

 

“How are Logan and Virgil doing, Patt?” Roman asked, a bit of worry bleeding into their voice. Thomas should probably figure out Roman and Patton’s pronouns soon.

 

“Um, well… Oh! They just started waking up!” Patton called back, grinning. Sure enough, two groans came from the remaining two figures on the ground. The slightly taller of the two’s eyes opened, blinking furiously as the eyes attempted to focus.

 

“Patt…? I can’ thee anything…” they croaked out. Patton blinked before looking around frantically for something. Patton quickly found what they were looking for and shoved a large pair of thick-framed black glasses onto the kid’s face. The kid blinked a couple more times before pushing themself up, wincing a bit as they did. Messy black curls fell into their blue eyes, and freckled cheeks became painted with a blush as Patton helped them finish sitting up. The kid wore a short-sleeved black polo and khaki shorts that were held up with rainbow suspenders. A small blue bowtie was fixed around their neck as well, and Thomas almost cooed at the adorable picture.

 

The fourth figure heaved themself up and rested a hand on the kid with the suspenders’s shoulder. This one wore a large black hoodie with patches of lilac flannel sewn onto it over a purple shirt and black shorts. Wavy black hair flopped into their face, hiding everything except for one violet eye that was taking in their surroundings in a quick, panicked manner. They also had a splattering of freckles across their cheeks, and they were picking at their black-painted nails nervously.

 

The black-haired kid with the glasses blinked as he took in his surroundings. “Ah… Patton, w-why are we manifethted?” they asked, fiddling with their bow tie.

 

“I’ve got no idea, kiddo. Um, you’re also aware that… you’re younger, right?” Patton offered, their blue eyes shining with concern and a bit of playful mirth. The kid with glasses startled and looked down, shrieking as they took in their appearance.

 

“Logan? Why are you– _WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON_?!” the one in the hoodie screeched as they seemed to finally come to their senses and noticed their own body. Thomas startled at the curse word that emerged from the young child’s mouth. Roman giggled a little while Patton puffed out their cheeks in frustration. “Language, Virgil!” they huffed. The little kid, probably called Virgil, ignored Patton and shot to their feet, spinning frantically in circles as they tried to see what was going on with their body. The kid with glasses, presumably Logan, pushed themself to their feet and almost immediately fell back down because their legs were shaking so bad. Roman dashed forward to steady them, the bespectacled one murmuring their thanks to the red-head.

 

“Okay! We’ll figure out what’s going on with you guys, but first, can I please get some introductions?” Thomas yelled to silence the one in the hoodie’s screeching. All four of them immediately fell silent and stared at Thomas with wide, unblinking eyes. Thomas let out a breath and pushed himself to his feet, staring down at the strangers in his house. Finally, Roman snapped out of it and stepped forward, leaving Patton to support the kid with glasses.

 

“Well, as I already told you, my name is Roman. He/him pronouns are preferred, by the way, for all of us,” he said, crossing his arms in a show of defensiveness. Patton then stepped forward, carefully dragging the other two with him.

 

“Hey! I’m Patton,” he chirped before looking down at the other two. “You kiddos wanna introduce yourselves?”

 

“Salutations. My name is Logan,” the one with glasses directed towards Thomas. He sounded as if he was forcing his words into a certain shape, and Thomas wondered about that. He had heard a bit of a lisp earlier, but there was nothing to be ashamed about with a lisp. So why did this kid feel the need to hide it?

 

“Virgil,” the boy in the hoodie mumbled before burying his head into Logan’s side. Logan simply curled his arm around Virgil and pulled the boy closer without even looking down. Thomas stifled a coo at the adorableness and turned to face Patton, who appeared to be the oldest.

 

“So, any idea how you guys all ended up here?” Thomas asked, still trying to wrap his head around their existence in general. All four of them shook their heads no, and Thomas sighed heavily in resignation.

 

“Okay, well, it’s getting pretty late, and I don’t think we’re going to accomplish anything tonight. We can go shopping for clothes tomorrow, but for right now, do all of you mind just sharing a bed, or do you wanna sleep apart from the others?” Thomas sighed, already mentally rearranging some time tomorrow to fit in taking care of these new people who were also apparently him.

 

“I’m sleeping with Logan,” Virgil mumbled, not moving from his position buried into Logan’s side. “And I’m sleeping with Virgil and Logan,” Patton announced, wrapping an arm around the two kid’s shoulders. Thomas looked at Roman to gauge his reaction, and Roman just sighed.

 

“Well, it appears that all four of us are sleeping together, then,” he announced, already starting for the stairs. Patton followed, shepherding the two younger ones along with him. Thomas followed as well, mostly to make sure that they didn’t break anything and to grab some blankets and pillows for the couch.

 

When all of them reached his room, Logan stopped and looked around in confusion. “Thomas… where will you be sleeping?” he asked, placing special emphasis on the first letter of the last word.

 

“On the couch. Figured I’d let you guys have the bed. I just came up to help you all get settled.”

 

“Oh.” Logan blinked, eyes brimming with an unknown emotion. Surprise, joy, concern, exhaustion? Who knew. Thomas went over to the closet and pulled out a couple of extra pillows and blankets for his guests before swiping a couple for himself.

 

“Night, guys. We’ll figure this out in the morning,” he called, leaving them to their own devices as he walked back downstairs. He collapsed onto the couch as soon as it was in sight, extremely drained from the very stressful and trying last hour of his life. He blacked out almost instantly, hoping the kids upstairs were doing okay.

* * *

 

“Okay, everyone’s shoes are over by the door, right?” Patton asked, pulling off his hoodie and tossing it on the floor. Four pairs of shoes were lined up along the wall by the door, and Patton breathed a sigh of relief. So far, so good. Now then…

 

“Roman! Take off your sash and the jacket. I know you have a tank top on underneath, and I promise you, that’ll be much more comfortable to sleep in,” Patton ordered. Roman groaned but did as Patton asked, carefully pulling off the mentioned articles of clothing and folding them crisply before placing them on top of Patton’s hoodie. He quickly crawled under the covers after that, leaving Patton to deal with Logan and Virgil.

  
“Virge… Will you feel more comfortable in your hoodie?” Patton asked softly. Virgil nodded, and Patton smiled back in encouragement. He knew that Virgil was really shaken by this new and scary situation, and he wanted to do everything in his power to make Virgil more comfortable. Virgil went and crawled into the bed, making sure to place as much space between him and Roman as possible. Patton sighed and turned his attention to the last member of his little family. Logan froze when Patton locked gazes with him.

 

“Logan. Were you about to crawl into bed with your glasses on?” Patton asked, arching his eyebrow. Logan slowly nodded before carefully sliding his glasses off and placing them on the side table next to Patton’s. Patton wasn’t done with getting him to be more comfortable, however.

 

“Lo. You might be more comfortable without the bow tie and suspenders, don’tcha think?” Logan sighed heavily but did as Patton suggested before basically worming his way up to Virgil. The two only took a couple minutes to rearrange themselves, but pretty soon, it was hard to tell one from the other, that’s how closely they were cuddling each other. Patton grinned and turned off the lights before softly padding over to the bed and crawling onto Virgil’s other side, effectively smushing him between he and Logan. Roman wrapped his arms around Logan’s waist as Patton pulled the blankets up to everyone’s chins. Virgil whimpered a little at the darkness, but Patton and Logan hushed him fairly quickly.

 

“Nothing’s gonna hurt you, Virge. We’re here, and everything will be back to normal tomorrow. You’ll see,” Patton whispered. Virgil let out a hum that probably showed his disbelief, but he didn’t speak up, instead closing his eyes and trying to get to sleep. Patton stayed up and watched his family all nod off, smiling softly the whole time. He didn’t actually know if everything would be solved tomorrow, but he knew that he needed to have hope, if not for him, but for the others. With that thought, Patton let sleep overtake him, hoping that he would wake up back in his own bed and that everything had just been a bad dream.


	2. I Don't Know Where I'm Running (But I Know How To Run)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Discussions are Had, Plans are Made (and then Foiled), and Cereal (and Toast with Crofter's) is Consumed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! Thanks so much for all the support on the last chapter! This is my first time venturing into the fandom, and I really didn't know if I would be any good. Thanks for all the kind comments, guys! 
> 
> So, this chapter is a bit shorter than the last. I'm posting this two days before school starts back up for me, so expect longer periods between updates, but with longer chapters. This is just more of a filler chapter. Sorry! Now, on with the story!
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything recognizable. All rights go to the original creators. I'm just having a bit of fun with their characters~

Thomas woke slowly that morning, blinking more than usual at the unfamiliar angle of light that was streaming between the blinds into his face. They normally didn’t do that. Why was he sleeping on the couch? Did he fall asleep working? That’s the only reason he could think of, except his laptop was all the way across the room, so that couldn’t possibly be it. Why else would he sleep on the couch?

 

 

The events of last night suddenly came rushing back. Were they actually real? The evidence suggested that they were, but maybe he was simply going crazy. Only one real way to find out, Thomas decided, and with that he heaved himself to his feet and wandered over to the stairs to go up to his bedroom. He paused for a second outside of his door, scenarios flashing through his head. Eventually, Thomas just shoved them down and opened the door slowly, more interested in finding the truth than in dealing with a mental crisis. 

 

 

Four strangers were curled up in his bed. Thomas blinked and rubbed his eyes a couple times just to make sure he wasn’t seeing things, but nope, there were definitely four strangers curled up in his bed. 

 

 

“What the frick,” Thomas whispered softly. He gently closed the door and tiptoed back down the stairs. Ideas and plans and questions and colourful phrases all swirled through his mind, but Thomas finally managed to wrangle said thoughts into just one. All the others could wait for a later time. Right now, breakfast. 

 

 

“Now… what would the others eat for breakfast?” Thomas wondered aloud, staring into his cupboards. “I mean, they’re me, so… Cereal should work, right?” With that, Thomas pulled out five bowls, five spoons, a full gallon of milk, and all of the cereal in his cupboard. He set them out on the table before heading back upstairs. He slowly pushed the door back open and quietly walked over to the bed. After a moment of internal debate, Thomas gently placed a hand on Patton’s shoulder and gave him a gentle shake. 

 

 

“Hey, Patton. I have breakfast for you guys,” Thomas called softly. Patton’s blue eyes flutter open and he blearily glances up at Thomas. His lips pull back into a sleepy smile and he gives a slight nod in response. Thomas nods back and turns around, sending Patton a quick smile before he did. With that, Thomas left the room to return to the kitchen, allowing Patton to get the others up. 

 

 

Five minutes later, Roman wandered down the stairs, yawning and stretching. His red hair stuck out in all directions, the waves Thomas had noticed in it yesterday causing it to flop everywhere. 

 

 

“Good morning, Roman,” Thomas called. Roman startled at Thomas’s voice and stared at him with wide red eyes. After a solid five seconds of staring, Roman seemed to realize the state that his hair was in, and he yelped before attempting to wrangle his hair into what he probably considered a presentable style. Thomas snorted; Roman simply pouted in response before flouncing over to the table and dropping down into a chair with a huff. 

 

 

“Roman, relax. It’s just me. I don’t care what you look like,” Thomas soothed. Roman continued to pout and glanced up. 

 

 

“Thomas. If I don’t have a standard for myself, then I’m no better than Sunshine,” Roman shot back, an offended undercurrent pitching his voice closer to his falsetto register. Thomas opened his mouth, maybe to ask who Sunshine was, maybe to try and soothe Roman further, but he didn’t have a chance. 

 

 

“Roman, I put a lot of effort into my appearance. You just don’t appreciate it,” a younger voice called. Thomas glanced over to the doorway and saw Virgil, his feet firmly planted and arms crossed. His violet eyes shone with some form of fiery emotion, maybe anger or defiance. His hair wasn’t as messy as Roman’s, but could still be considered a form of bedhead. His hoodie swamped his small frame, something that was even more obvious in the light of morning. 

 

 

“Just keep telling yourself that, Jack Smellington,” Roman shot back, his perfectly shaped eyebrows arched. Virgil rolled his eyes and sat down across the table from Roman. The two then proceeded to start a staring contest with glaring. Thomas contemplated breaking it up, but the appearance of Logan and Patton answered that question for him. 

 

 

“Roman, Virgil. Behave. We have a lot to discuss,” Patton admonished. Virgil and Roman both rolled their eyes but ultimately backed down. Patton grinned and sat down between Roman and Thomas, while Logan sat down between Virgil and Thomas. 

 

 

“So, have at the cereal, guys, and we’ll discuss what to do as we eat,” Thomas offered, reaching for the box of Cheerios. Patton grabbed the Lucky Charms right before Roman did, causing Roman to let out offended noises. Virgil cautiously grabbed the Cheerios from Thomas when he was done pouring his bowl. Logan didn’t reach for any cereal, only sitting there fidgeting with his tie and glasses. 

 

 

“Logan? You… want any cereal?” Thomas asked. Logan shook his head and kept fidgeting. Thomas’s eyebrows furrowed, but Patton spoke before Thomas could ask anything. 

 

 

“Lo, what do you want? I’m sure we could make some toast with Crofter’s really quick,” Patton offered. Logan nodded, and Patton jumped up and ran over to the counter. Thomas parted his lips, ready to ask about what the heck was going on, but Virgil just shook his head while mouthing  _ later _ . Thomas snapped his jaw closed and nodded slightly, hoping Logan didn’t notice. 

 

 

“You know that I know you are talking about me over my head, right?” Well crap. He noticed, and he was pretty annoyed about it. 

 

 

“Sorry, Lo, just explaining your hatred of cereal,” Virgil answered. Logan bit his lip and opened his mouth, put Patton cut in with a plate of toast coated with Crofter’s. 

 

 

“Here you go, Lo-Lo!” Patton chirped, his smile shining like the sun. Logan gave a small grin in response and began to gently nibble on the toast while Patton went back to his now-soggy cereal. 

 

 

“So… we have no idea how this happened, right?” Thomas asked. Everyone paused, and finally nodded. Logan sighed and placed his toast down before adjusting his glasses. He cleared his throat and began to speak. 

 

 

“I have… a few theories, b-but nothing concrete. At the moment, all we can do is make the most of… this situation,” Logan stated, pausing for a few moments in what seemed like an attempt to form words ahead of time. 

 

 

“Right, kiddo! So… what do you want to do, Thomas?” Patton jumped in, his smile seemingly growing larger. Thomas wondered how much of that smile was actually real at this point, since it didn’t seem possible for someone to have that large of a smile for that long. Thomas shoved a bite of Cheerios in his mouth to give himself a couple extra seconds to think. Honestly, to Thomas, what mattered more was making sure that these kids were well-cared for, so that meant a trip to get clothing and groceries. 

 

 

“I’m thinking a shopping trip for clothing and groceries would be best,” Thomas finally ventured, his brown eyes flickering around to gauge the reactions in the room. Roman’s eyes widened and he started bouncing in his seat, his hands clapping together as he began to show more and more teeth. Patton was pretty close behind in terms of outward reaction, almost showing as many teeth as Roman and eyes that, if possible, were even larger and full of stars. 

 

 

Logan and Virgil, on the other hand, had almost opposite reactions. Logan’s pupil’s blew wide open as his chest started to rise and fall a bit faster than was normal for a boy his age, and Virgil seemed to retreat further into his hoodie, if that was even possible. Thomas frowned and quickly amended his previous suggestion. “Um… you don’t have to come if you don’t want to.” 

 

 

“Aw, but it would be more exciting if all of us were there!” Roman whined, giving Thomas a pleading look. Patton joined in with a set of puppy dog eyes that probably no one could say no to, and Thomas’s resolve began to crumble. 

 

 

“Perhaps we should test and see if we are still able to summon objects from the Mindscape?” Logan suggested, his voice sounding even more controlled and strained than before. Virgil quickly nodded in agreement, and a few of Roman’s teeth vanished from Thomas’s sight. 

 

 

“Fine. Spoilsports.” With that, Roman waved his hand, and a large pile of clothing appeared on the floor in front of them. Everyone’s eyes widened at that. 

 

 

“Holy shit, that worked,” Virgil whispered. 

 

 

“Language, kiddo,” Patton whispered back. Virgil seemed to ignore him, which Thomas was inclined to agree with just at this moment. The appearance of a bunch of clothes was more important than a six-year-old swearing. 

 

 

“So… we can still summon stuff. Good to know,” Roman murmured, finally stepping forward towards the pile. Logan seemed to snap out of his trance as well and followed, allowing his long, thin fingers to ghost over a piece of white fabric. 

 

 

“We can summon stuff, but we can’t return to the Mindscape? What kind of fucked-up logic is that?” Virgil asked, finally walking forward. Patton followed, a frown creasing his soft features. 

 

 

“Great! There’s clothing here for everyone. Nerd, Emo Nightmare, Padre, here you go!” Roman called as he began tossing bundles of fabric at everyone’s heads. Thomas sighed, secretly relieved that he wasn’t going to have to spend a couple hundred bucks on clothing. The kids all gathered up their respective clothing bundles that Roman had somehow sorted and headed up the stairs. 

 

 

“If you guys wanna shower, there’s shampoo, conditioner, body soap, and face wash in the shower already!” Thomas called. Four affirmatives answered back, and Thomas sighed before dragging a hand down his face. He should probably clean up breakfast. And make a grocery list. And contemplate more permanent sleeping arrangements. He had a lot of things that he should probably do. But first, chores. Maybe doing something normal would make this whole situation seem better. (That kind of thinking hadn’t ever worked before, but hey, there’s always a first time for everything.) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for making it through the steaming trash pile I wrote while pulling an all-nighter. Hope you liked it! Don't worry, the angst and H/C is coming really soon. I just have to establish a few things first. 
> 
> Feel free to scream at me in the comments! Concrit is LOVED, flames are promptly ignored. 
> 
> Love you all, guys, and I'll see you next chapter!
> 
> ~Ash


	3. You Feel Like Laughing (But You Start To Cry)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Logan is a Nerd (what else is new), Arguments are Had, and Strangers are Way Too Kind to be Normal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, look at me, procrastinating on doing my AP Calc and AP Euro homework by writing fanfiction. 
> 
> But seriously, I needed a break. Why my past self decided to take all AP classes this year, I will never know. They obviously didn't realize how much it would suck. 
> 
> But I'm back! With a new chapter! And some angst! And hurt/comfort! And fluff! 
> 
> So, just a heads-up, this chapter has an argument. It's not SUPER intense, but I'm telling you anyway. Also, a mention of divorce. Again, not super described, just a throw-away line or two. If that makes you uncomfortable though, then feel free to skip this chapter; you won't miss much in terms of plot. And... a couple of my OCs managed to sneak their way in. They won't pop up for the rest of the story and they're not SUPER important, just thought I should let you know. I was working on the novel with them in it earlier today, and I guess my brain decided to add them without my consent. So, yeah... This chapter is brought to you by Procrastination on Homework and Three Cups of Coffee. 
> 
> Anyway, enough of my rambling! On with the story! 
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Again, literally all I own is the plot and a certain two OCs who are only here for this chapter. Everything else belongs to the amazingly wonderful Thomas Sanders. I'm just having fun for a bit.

Logan re-emerged from the shower first, his curly hair plastered against his skull from the water. He wore practically the same outfit as he had yesterday, except that he wore long sleeves instead of short sleeves. His glasses were fogged with light condensation, but overall, he looked a bit more relaxed than he had at breakfast. 

 

 

“Hey, buddy. How was the shower?” Thomas asked gently, looking up from his grocery list. Logan paused for a moment before his shoulders lost some of their tension and he padded over to the table. 

 

 

“Satisfactory, thank you for your concern,” he murmured in reply, sliding into a chair next to Thomas to look at what he was doing. Thomas angled the list a bit more to allow the younger one to look at it. Logan took a moment to glance at it before gently tugging it out of Thomas’s hand. Thomas allowed him, curious to see where this was going. 

 

 

“This is a decent start, but more fruits and vegetables would be a good idea. Roman has a habit of snacking, so finding something healthy but filling would be a good idea as well. I recommend nuts or grapes, but both of those tend to be more expensive. Patton has no real preference for food, so he’ll eat whatever you buy.” Logan explained as he went to work, scribbling out certain items and writing in new ones, complete with rough estimations of caloric and nutritional facts and price ranges that would be acceptable. He continued to speak as he worked, his control over pronunciation slipping as he went. “Virgil tends to not eat that much, but he also is a bit pickier. He despises foods laden with artificial sugars and preservatives, so steering clear of those would be smart, even if Patton and Roman will eat them. You may also want to stock up on various coffees and teas, seeing as Virgil, Roman, and I drink quite a lot of coffee. Roman doesn’t drink tea, but Virgil and I do. It helps with ou—  _ his _ — anxiety, and I find the taste soothing.” Thomas did not miss the fact that Logan almost said  _ our  _ in reference to anxiety; he filed that information away for later discussion. “As for my own preferences, I have included them on the list already.” 

 

 

After another few seconds of writing, Logan flourished the list towards Thomas, a small smile tugging at his lips. Thomas took it and looked it over, surprised and oddly proud of how much effort Logan had put into the list. 

 

 

“This… is really helpful, Logan. Thank you,” Thomas said, a smile spreading across his own face. Logan’s small smile widened, and his blue eyes shone with an emotion Thomas though might be pride. 

 

 

“Hello, Thomas! And you, nerd!” Roman’s voice cut through and shattered the moment as he strolled into the kitchen, wearing a white T-shirt under a red and white letter jacket that was paired with a pair of dark skinny jeans and red Converse. Logan stiffened at the dramatic voice, and any and all emotions dropped off his face in the time it took for Thomas to blink in shock at Roman’s arrival. His red hair was now fixed into a style that could only be described as fashionably messy, and Thomas was trying to figure out if that was eyeliner, mascara, blush, and a neutral-toned lip gloss or if Roman just naturally looked that perfect. 

 

 

“Greetings, Roman. Thomas and I just finished making up a grocery list that would best suit all of our needs without making Thomas spend more money than he can afford,” Logan grit out. His lisp was completely gone now, but Thomas suspected that it was because he was hissing words out through his teeth and he was attempting to sound in control. 

 

 

“No need to sound so strained, Calculator Watch,” Roman huffed, rolling his eyes before plopping down into a seat across from Thomas. Logan rolled his eyes right back and went back to staring at the list. Roman smirked, and Thomas decided that maybe he should listen to that sinking feeling in his stomach and break this up before it got nastier. Luckily for him, he didn’t have to. 

 

 

“Roman, leave Logan alone,” Virgil drawled, sweeping into the kitchen just as Roman started to open his mouth. Did all of Thomas’s new roommates have a flair for the dramatic? It certainly seemed so, especially once Virgil’s appearance was put into consideration. The kid wore heavy winged eyeliner with black eyeshadow artfully smudged under his eyes, bringing out the bright violet of his irises. His black and purple hoodie was paired today with another purple shirt, this one a light lilac, and a black skirt over black-and-purple striped tights with lilac high top Converse. He seemed to either not notice or not care about Thomas’s staring and just kept walking, jumping up into a seat next to Logan and fixing a glare towards Roman. 

 

 

“I wasn’t doing anything!” Roman protested, glaring right back. Logan fidgeted a bit in his seat, and Virgil flicked his eyes over at the slight movement. A silent conversation passed between the two, leaving Roman and Thomas glancing at each other in confusion. Patton bounded into the kitchen at that moment, beaming. The smile started to drop a bit as he obviously picked up on the tension in the room, but it returned in full force as he sat down next to Roman.

 

 

“Hey, kiddos! What are we talking about?” Thomas’s heart welled up with gratitude for the bubbly teen. He had always hated tense, confrontational situations, and as such had no idea how to deal with them when they were between… well, himself. That sounded weird. He should get some advice from his friends if he had to deal with this for much longer. 

 

 

Oh God, his friends. What was he going to tell Joan and Talyn?! No matter how he phrased it, he sounded absolutely insane. 

 

 

“The grocery list. I believe now that we are all gathered, we should head out so as to avoid the traffic later in the evening,” Logan stated, snapping Thomas out of his swirling thoughts. Oh, right. Patton’s question. 

 

 

“Yeah, I thought so too. Everyone good with that?” Thomas asked. Everyone, even Virgil, nodded their assent, and Thomas swiftly stood up to go grab his keys. 

 

 

“Great. Let’s head out, then.” Cheers erupted from Patton and Roman as they practically sprinted out the front door to his car, Logan and Virgil hanging back and waiting for him. Thomas noticed that Virgil was picking at his nails again, and shot him a— hopefully— reassuring smile. Virgil grimaced back, probably an attempt at a smile. This was going to be interesting for everyone involved, Thomas decided, as he ushered the two younger kids out the door to his car.

* * *

 

“No, Roman, for the last time, you cannot buy that overly expensive organic yoghurt,” Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Thomas agreed, his eyes almost bugging out when he caught sight of the price. There was no way he could afford that. 

 

 

“Aw, why not? We bought Virgil that expensive coffee he likes!” Roman whined, crossing his arms over his chest. Virgil glanced up from where he was inspecting eggs, his eyebrows arching in a possibly judgmental, possibly confused, fashion. 

 

 

“Yes, but I also drink that coffee, as do you. No one else in this family eats yoghurt except for you, Roman, so it is pointless to get a food item that only one person will eat,  _ especially  _ when it is that expensive,” Logan explained, his voice tight. Thomas wished Patton was here to help this argument that had happened three times already over different food items, but sadly, Patton was off finding soups that Thomas could make for dinner in an emergency. 

 

 

“So? Haven’t you ever heard of the concept ‘treat yourself’? It’s where you buy one luxury item per grocery trip, as a way to reward yourself for going out and doing something! It’s the same idea here!” Roman shot back, his red eyes narrowing. Thomas glanced around nervously at the other shoppers who were beginning to shoot curious or annoyed glances in their direction. He needed to shut this fight down, fast. 

 

 

“That only applies when we have the extra money, Roman! We don’t  _ have  _ the luxury of buying unneeded overpriced yoghurt! I get that this is new to you, but will you please just  _ listen to me  _ for  _ once  _ in your GODDAMN LIFE?!” Logan shrieked at the end. 

 

 

“Well, maybe I don’t want to, Logan! Ever consider that?! I get that it’s hard for you to comprehend  _ feelings _ , but you need to realize that you’re NOT ALWAYS RIGHT!” Roman screamed right back. Virgil flinched, thankfully not dropping the carton of eggs he was holding, at the sound. Silence fell over the two arguing kids, both of their chests heaving up and down in an attempt to recover some semblance of composure. By now, everyone in the near vicinity had their eyes on the two, and Thomas stepped forward, hand raised to placate, in an effort to get the situation under control. 

 

 

“Fine,” Logan finally responded, his voice as frigid as Antarctic winds. “If you are not going to listen, then I guess you do not really need me.” With that, he spun around and stalked off. Thomas paused, torn between going after Logan and calming Roman down. Virgil made the decision easier for him. 

 

 

“Here’s the eggs you wanted, Thomas. I’ll go get Logan,” he mumbled, twitching under the stares of so many strangers. He carefully set the eggs in the shopping cart before running off in the same direction Logan had just dashed off in, leaving Thomas to console the dramatic red-head. 

 

 

Roman’s hands were still clenched into fists at his sides, his breathing laboured, as Thomas gently placed a hand on his shoulder. He startled, looking up at Thomas with wide eyes. 

 

 

“Roman. I get that this is all new and maybe a little scary for you, but you can’t just lash out like that. I get that you’re upset, but Logan was actually right in this case; I don’t have the money,” he gently said, hoping that Roman wouldn’t blow up at him like he just had with Logan. 

 

 

“I know. Just… I don’t actually know what happened. One minute I was fine, and then the next, all I wanted to do was lash out at someone,” Roman whispered. Thomas bit his lip as he contemplated his next move. His eyes swept his surrounding, possibly to garner help from someone, possibly hoping for inspiration on what to say next. Most of the shoppers had moved on, except for two young women who were whispering to themselves while shooting glances in Roman’s direction. Thomas turned back to Roman, deciding to just wing it and hope he didn’t make anything worse. 

 

 

“Roman, I get it. You’re stressed and you need an outlet. That outlet should not be Logan, though, or anyone else. Okay?” Roman nodded sadly, and Thomas sighed before an idea popped into his head. “Once we get everything from our list, maybe I could get us some ice cream? Would that cheer you up?” Roman perked up a bit and nodded, causing Thomas to let out a little grin. Movement registered in the corner of his vision, and he glanced over to see one of the young women standing next to him, a small smile on her face. 

 

 

“I couldn’t help but overhear you two, and I have to ask: are you two doing alright?” she (?) asked, her green eyes shining with something that Thomas thought might be concern. 

 

 

“Yeah. We’re just… going through a new, difficult situation right now,” Thomas answered. It wasn’t technically lying; it just wasn’t telling the whole truth. 

 

 

“Divorce?” the woman asked, pursing her lips. 

 

 

“Yeah,” Thomas answered, thinking that it might be the easiest way to get through this situation. It’s not like she was ever going to run into him again, after all. She was just a stranger trying to be nice. 

 

 

“Ah. Thought so. How old are you, kid?” she asked Roman, blowing a strand of fiery red hair out of her face. 

 

 

“Fourteen,” Roman slowly responded, obviously cautious. The woman let out a long breath and gently placed a hand on his shoulder, looking him dead in the eye. 

 

 

“You’re doing remarkably well, considering the situation. And I get it, I do. You want things back to the way they were before. They’re not going to go back to that, though. And lashing out at your younger brother like that won’t help. Finding another outlet is definitely going to help in the long run, kiddo,” she offered, an undecipherable emotion flashing across her face as she spoke. Roman slowly nodded in understanding, and she smiled, letting go of his shoulder and straightening. She then turned to Thomas and fixed him with a piercing stare. “As for you, remember that they’re still kids. They need time, patience, and a lot of love. You’ll all get through this, I’m sure, but you need to do it together.” 

 

 

“I’ll try. Thank you for the advice, ma’am,” Thomas answered. Her mouth curved upwards in amusement and she nodded. She then reached into her pocket and pulled out her wallet. 

 

 

“Oh, no, you don’t have to-” Thomas protested, but she cut him off with a hard stare. 

 

 

“You look stressed out of your mind, son. The least I could do is help out a bit.” 

 

 

“You don’t even know me, though,” Thomas protested. She shrugged and handed over five twenties. Thomas’s eyes bugged out of his sockets as he looked at her. 

 

 

“I can afford it, don’t worry. Plus, you’re going to need it on a single income with four kids. Trust me, I’ve been there,” she simply offered, sticking her wallet back into her jeans pocket. Roman simply stared at her in shock, and Thomas would have joined him had another pressing thought not entered his mind at that moment. 

 

 

“I need to go find my other kids,” Thomas realized. He’d probably address the fact that he called them his kids out loud later, but right now, he really needed to find them, especially considering that Logan had run off upset and that Virgil was extremely young. 

 

 

“Oh, no worries. My wife went after them,” the red-haired woman answered, waving off Thomas’s concern. “In fact,” She pulled out her phone and tapped at the screen. “She’s bringing them back right now. She also found your eldest, in case you were worried about him.” 

 

 

“Oh thank God, I forgot Patton was alone,” Thomas breathed out. Roman carefully patted Thomas on the back, probably trying to be supportive. 

 

 

“Thomas! Roman! There you are! Are you guys okay?” Patton’s voice called. Thomas turned around to see a black-and-purple-haired woman walking over with Virgil clutching one of her hands and Logan the other, Patton dashing in front of them towards Thomas and Roman. 

 

 

“Patton!” Roman yelled, crashing into the blonde as he sprinted forward to accept the hug. Thomas and the red-haired woman chuckled. The other strange woman walked over to him, a bemused smile painting her face. 

 

 

“Quite the handful, aren’t they?” she offered, a thick Scottish brogue rolling her words. Thomas nodded, not sure what else to say. He felt a small tug at his hand and glanced down to see Virgil gazing up at him, his violet eyes wide. Thomas knelt down and wrapped him into a hug before standing back up and bringing the small child with him. 

 

 

“Thank you for finding them, miss,” Thomas said, turning to the Scottish woman. Logan released her hand and quickly dashed to Thomas’s side. The Scottish woman chuckled before answering Thomas. 

 

 

“It was no problem, really. They’re wonderful kids; you’ve definitely been raising them right.” 

 

 

“Still, thank you. Not everyone would have done that.” That was true. Most people would have just left the situation alone and gone about their business. 

 

 

“I was raised to always help people, and it’s one of the only parts of my upbringing that I still agree with,” the woman replied, shrugging nonchalantly.

 

 

“Well, I think we’ve taken enough of your time, ma’ams, and I really do want to get home before traffic gets bad…” Thomas offered after a moment of awkward silence. He turned to go when the Scottish woman shot out her hand and grabbed his wrist in a strong grip. He stopped and turned back to look at her. 

 

 

“Before you go, here.” She quickly pulled out a piece of paper and scribbled a few lines of writing onto it before shoving it into his hand, along with another five twenties. “Before you protest, I can definitely afford it, and you truly need the money more. Plus, I put down mine and Neah’s numbers, along with a couple of our other friends, just in case you need help, or advice, or anything. Don’t hesitate to call. Raising kids is fucking challenging, and no one should go through it alone.” 

 

 

“... I don’t know what to say. Thank you so much, uh…” Thomas trailed off, suddenly realizing that these two strange women had never introduced themselves. 

 

 

“Ollie. Ollie Breckenridge. And this here is my lovely wife, Neah Larson. And you’re very welcome, Mr. …?” the Scottish woman, Ollie, replied, sticking out her hand for a handshake. Thomas took it and answered “Thomas. Sanders.” 

 

 

“Well, Mr. Sanders, have a nice day. We must be going. Good luck handling this rowdy bunch!” With that, Ollie grabbed the basket full of fresh produce from the ground and left, Neah trailing behind her. With a final wave of farewell, the red-head vanished, leaving Thomas alone with the other four. 

 

 

“Well that was… strange…” Logan offered after a minute. Thomas shook his head to clear his thoughts and looked down. 

 

 

“Yeah, that was. You feeling better?” At Logan’s nod, Thomas relaxed a bit. 

 

 

“Uh, Thomas? Could you put me down?” Virgil asked, squirming a bit in Thomas’s hold. 

 

 

“Oh! Sure! Sorry, Virgil,” Thomas rushed out, carefully setting the extremely light boy down. 

 

 

“Well, I think the only thing left to get is a couple gallons of milk, and then we’re done shopping!” Patton chirped. He had grabbed the shopping cart and was already inching over towards the next aisle, Roman following him. 

 

 

“Yeah… Hey, Roman, Logan? Would you two like to pick out a gallon or two of ice cream for all of us to eat?” Thomas requested. Both of them perked up and nodded. Roman dashed off before Thomas could even blink, and Logan followed behind a bit slower, his steps still filled with enthusiasm. Virgil snorted at the antics of the others, and Thomas finally cracked a smile. Everything was going to be alright, after all. 

 

 

“Well, then, onwards to the milk!” Thomas called dramatically. Patton cheered, and Thomas grabbed Virgil’s hand before following the excitable blonde. They had dinner to make, ice cream to eat, and cartoons to marathon, after all, so why waste time standing around next to the yoghurt?  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... that was the chapter. If you enjoyed my garbage dump... first off, why? Second off, thank you. 
> 
> Leave all your thoughts in the comments! I love hearing from you guys. Concrit is especially valued. 
> 
> Also, I'm thinking of starting a writing Tumblr, for all of my fanfics and original work. What do you guys think? Do you want to see that? Let me know, and I'll see about making one. 
> 
> Well, that's the end of my mad ramblings. See you guys next time! And seriously, thank you for reading.


	4. They Fall Down On Their Own

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Secrets Are Revealed, Plushies are Found, and Logan Makes a Friend (spoilers: it's Joan)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This... took me... SO LONG... to write... I hope ya'll like it. 
> 
> Happy holidays, loves! On with the story!

Thomas blinked awake the next morning, exhausted yet content. He wondered why he was yet again sleeping on the couch, this time in an upright position, when he registered a couple of warm weights curled up into his sides. He glanced down to see what was going on, and his heart melted at the adorable sight that greeted him. Patton and Roman were cuddling in their sleep on Thomas’s right side, Patton’s slightly-higher-than-average body temperature radiating into Thomas because of the close proximity. On his left side, Logan and Virgil appeared to be attempting to fuse together, that’s how closely they were cuddling. Virgil was imitating a baby koala, his long limbs wrapped around Logan’s body as he clung to his chest, while Logan had tangled his legs together with Virgil’s. Overall, it was an adorable sight, and Thomas sneakily grabbed out his phone to snap a picture of the sleeping kids. He was just debating how best to extract himself from the cuddle pile so as not to wake any of them up when a loud knock sounded at the door. He jumped, startled, and wracked his brain for possibilities on who could be here at this hour. He groaned when the answer came to him. Joan and Talyn had agreed to come over today so that they could work on a video. What was he possibly going to tell them about the sleeping aspects cuddled all around him? 

 

“Thomas? You awake yet, man?” Joan’s voice called from outside. Thomas sighed and gave up on slowly untangling himself, instead just jumping up from the couch and walking to the door, ignoring the sleepy grumbles of complaint from behind him. He opened the door, blinking his eyes rapidly to adjust them to the bright sunlight, and grinned sheepishly at Joan and Talyn. 

 

“Hey, guys, I was asleep, sorry,” Thomas laughed nervously. Talyn arched an eyebrow at him, suspicion radiating off of them. 

 

“That’s fine, Thomas. What’s got you so anxious?” they asked, shoving their hands into the pockets of their jeans. Thomas sighed and decided to just bite the bullet and tell them. 

 

“So, something weird happened a couple days ago. Apparently, and none of us can figure out how, a few aspects of my personality manifested permanently into the real world, and now they’re living with me. I don’t know how to get them to unmanifest, they don’t know why they’re like this, we just all know that I have to take care of them for the time being,” Thomas rushed out, anxiety churning in his gut. What if they thought he was crazy? What if they tried to get him to a mental hospital? What if he  _ was  _ crazy?! 

 

“Okay… Thomas, how much sleep have you gotten in the past couple days?” Joan asked slowly, their words long and drawn out as if they were trying to not spook him. 

 

“At least eight hours a night. Look, I’m fairly certain I’m not crazy, just… come in and you’ll see,” Thomas huffed, leading his two friends into the living room. Joan and Talyn followed, and Thomas felt the exact second they noticed the sleeping aspects on his couch. Now that Thomas had had them around for a couple days, he had noticed that they all had extremely similar facial features, even if certain physical attributes were different. (He may have also pulled up pictures from his childhood to compare, and yep, these kids were definitely parts of him.) So, yeah, if that didn’t convince Joan and Talyn, he didn’t know what would. 

 

“What the fuck,” Joan whispered. Talyn nodded in agreement, obviously in too much shock to formulate a comment of their own. 

 

“I don’t know!” Thomas hissed. “I was hoping you guys could help me figure this out.” 

 

“Thomas… this goes behind the scope of weirdness that my brain can handle. I have no idea where to even start,” Talyn finally offered, their eyes wide. Thomas went to reassure them when a sleepy grumble cut through his thoughts. He spun around to see Logan and Virgil sitting up and untangling themselves, discontented murmurs coming from both of them. It only took them a couple of seconds to notice the two new people in the room, and when they did, they froze, dark blue and violet eyes widening in fear. Virgil shrunk back into his hoodie yet placed himself between Joan and Talyn and Logan, obviously in an attempt to protect him from the two new people. 

 

“Who the fuck are you two?” Virgil growled, and Thomas shivered as a chill settled over the room. No six year old had any right to sound that terrifying. Talyn snapped out of their shock first and approached, giving the two terrified kids a reassuring smile. 

 

“Hey, I’m Talyn. Thomas just told me about what’s going on. How are you two holding up?” they asked, walking around the couch to crouch in front of Virgil and Logan. Virgil quickly switched positions so that Logan was practically pinned to the couch and stared Talyn down. The effect was ruined a bit by his trembling frame, but still, he looked like he was one wrong word away from launching himself at Talyn in order to defend himself. 

 

“We  _ were  _ fine until two new people who I’ve never met in my life walked in!” Virgil hissed, his violet eyes narrowing. Thomas noticed that Logan still didn’t have his glasses on, and as such, the slightly older aspect was hiding behind Virgil, probably trying to let the one that could see handle this new and scary situation. 

 

“Hey, that’s fine. What’s your name, little guy?” Talyn continued, still trying to break through to Virgil. They glanced up at Thomas for a confirmation of pronouns, and Thomas nodded, mouthing “They’re all male” to make sure that Talyn understood. From behind him, Thomas heard Joan moving around, and when he glanced back, he saw Joan holding up two sets of glasses belonging to Logan and Patton.

 

“I-I’m Virgil,” Virgil muttered, beginning to uncurl a little. Talyn’s smile widened and they held out their fist for a fist bump. Virgil warily tapped his fist against theirs, and Talyn giggled a little. 

 

“That’s a nice name, Virgil. Want to come meet my friend Joan? They’re really nice and they’re not going to hurt you, I promise.” Virgil slowly nodded and slid off the couch, pausing and holding his hand out to Logan. Logan warily took it and slid off the couch as well, obviously relying on Virgil for directions on where to go. Talyn held a hand out to Logan, and Logan flinched back. Talyn paused and crouched down to his level, trying to appear as non-threatening as possible. 

 

“What’s your name, kiddo?” they asked softly, something that Thomas appreciated. He still hadn’t been able to figure out why Logan was so jumpy, and that made him nervous. Had something happened to him? 

 

“L-Logan,” he stuttered, obviously working very hard to get his speech under control. 

 

“That’s a wonderful, name, Logan. We’re going over to Joan and Thomas now. Want to come with?” Logan nodded, and with that, Talyn slowly walked back around the couch and towards Thomas and Joan, Virgil trailing with Logan behind him. When they reached Thomas and Joan, Virgil wrapped the arm currently not being held by Logan around Thomas’s legs as he blinked shyly up at Joan. 

 

“Hey, Virgil and Logan, I’m Joan. Nice to meet you,” Joan offered, crouching down to give the two a high-five. Virgil cautiously reciprocated before leading Logan’s hand to Joan’s. Joan grinned and held out Patton’s glasses. “Are these yours, Logan?” Virgil opened his mouth to say something, probably no, when Logan’s hand shot out and gently grabbed the glasses before he shoved them on his face. He blinked, disoriented, before mumbling “No, these are Patton’s.” Virgil carefully grabbed Logan’s glasses and placed them into his hands. Logan swapped glasses, and when he could finally see, nodded at Joan in gratitude. 

 

“Thank you, Joan,” Logan stated, clasping his hands together in front of him. Joan grinned and ruffled Logan’s already messy black hair, ignoring the indignant squawks that emerged from him. 

 

“Anytime, buddy,” Joan replied before standing up. Logan huffed and attempted to fix his hair into a somewhat respectable hairstyle as Joan turned to Thomas. “Yeah, I think the video can wait a few hours. How do you want to go about this?” 

 

“Thomas? Who’s there?” Roman’s sleepy mumble cut through the discussion. The redhead was sitting up, rubbing his eyes and yawning, and Patton was also awake, already sliding off the couch. He was navigating much better than Logan had without his glasses, and Thomas quietly filed that information away for another time. 

 

“I’m assuming these are one of yours?” Joan offered, holding out Patton’s glasses. Patton blinked and came closer to inspect them. 

 

“Yep!” he chirped after a moment, gently grabbing them and shoving them onto his face. “Thanks… what’s your name?” 

 

“Oh! I’m Joan, and this is Talyn. What’s your name?” Joan asked, sticking their hand out for a handshake. Patton took it, beaming. 

 

“I’m Patton, and the sleepy redhead behind me is Roman,” he answered, giggling slightly at the indignant look on Roman’s face. “Nice to meet you, Joan and Talyn!” Joan beamed; Patton’s enthusiasm was clearly infectious. “Now, what could you two possibly be doing here in Thomas’s house this early in the morning?” 

 

“We were going to film a new video, but, well… now we’re here to help Thomas figure stuff out,” Joan replied, adjusting their beanie a bit. Patton blinked before comprehension dawned and he nodded. Roman yawned loudly while shooting Joan and Talyn a large thumbs-up, causing Patton to giggle a bit at the antics of the dramatic redhead. 

 

“Excellent. I believe our first order of business should be a clothing change?” Roman offered, voice muddled with sleep. Logan practically sprinted for the stairs the second Roman suggested that, Virgil not too far behind. Even Patton and Roman looked taken aback at the speed with which they had just been abandoned, and Joan was shooting anxious looks at the disappearing backs of the two youngest aspects. 

 

“I’m assuming those two are the antisocial parts of you?” Joan asked. Roman snorted, murmuring something along the lines of “How’d you guess?” until Patton elbowed him into silence. Thomas nodded confirmation for Joan’s question and then followed Logan and Virgil up the stairs, determined to figure out what was wrong. He found the bathroom door closed and no Virgil or Logan in sight, so, after bracing himself with a deep breath, he knocked on the bathroom door. 

 

A sniff came from inside, and then Virgil called back “We’ll be out in a bit.” 

 

“Virgil, Logan, it’s Thomas. May I come in?” Thomas queried quietly. A couple of soft whispers, so soft that Thomas couldn’t even make out individual words, a shuffling, a soft  _ click  _ of a door unlocking, and then Thomas found himself yanked inside the bathroom, letting out a startled yelp. He blinked rapidly, allowing his eyes to adjust to the harsh glare of the bathroom lights, to find Logan curled up in a tiny ball with Virgil crouching in front of him. 

 

“L was having a hard time with new people,” Virgil murmured by way of an explanation. Thomas’s brows furrowed in confusion. He was expecting that from Virgil, but from Logan? Virgil must have noticed his confusion, for he simply sighed and turned to Logan, whispering “Do you want me to tell him, L?” to the rocking Logan. Logan’s rocking paused and he nodded once, twice, three times, before resuming rocking. Virgil nodded once in response and turned to Thomas. 

 

“He’s autistic,” Virgil stated, voice flat. “He learned plenty of coping mechanisms over time, but our bodies have been regressed to the point where his body hasn’t learned those coping mechanisms. So, here we are.” 

 

“Oh.” Thomas, admittedly, didn’t know much about autism, and he wasn’t even sure how an aspect of him could have autism if he himself didn’t, but he shoved those unhelpful thoughts into the back of his mind; Logan was more important now. 

 

“Okay, so what helps you, Logan?” Thomas asked. Logan waved a hand vaguely, and Virgil translated: “His stuffed owl. Which is in the Mindscape. And we can’t summon it. I’ve been trying since we locked ourselves in here.” Logan made a high-pitched noise in his throat and pointed at Thomas. 

 

“... oh yeah.” Virgil turned to face Thomas. “Thomas, I need you to focus really hard on grabbing Logan’s owl.” 

 

“I don’t even know what it looks like!” Thomas exclaimed, panicking internally. He was just going to make everything worse for Logan, wasn’t he? Virgil groaned and facepalmed before grabbing out his phone, unlocking it, and going straight (ha) for his camera roll. He quickly found what he was looking for and shoved it at Thomas, who had to squint to focus his vision. He saw an adult Logan, sprawled out on a bed, cuddling a black-and-dark-blue galaxy-patterned owl with blue button eyes. Little tufts of fluff stuck out of the top of the owl’s head and brushed against Logan’s chin in the picture, and, Thomas realized with a start, the button eyes had been sewn on over and over again, a sign that the owl was well-loved. 

 

“There, now you know what it looks like. Can you just… summon it, please?” Virgil pleaded, putting his phone away and turning back to Logan. Thomas took a deep breath in through his nose, closed his eyes, and pictured the owl with all his might: how much it must mean to Logan, what sort of comfort it must bring, why Logan found such comfort in it. He felt something solid tickle the edge of his consciousness, and he reached towards it eagerly and  _ pulled _ . His fingers closed around something soft and solid, but it was Virgil’s strangled little noise that brought him back to reality. 

 

“You… you actually summoned it,” Virgil whispered. Thomas looked down, and sure enough, Logan’s owl was clenched firmly in his grasp. Logan made a happy noise before he snapped his arm out, snatched the owl out of Thomas’s hands, and brought it back to his chest to cuddle. Thomas blinked, but Virgil just shot him a grateful look before going back to taking care of Logan. 

 

“Thank you,” Virgil murmured. “Now, if you could go tell the others that Logan and I will be down in a few minutes?” Thomas nodded and stood to leave. 

 

“T-thank you… Thomas…” Logan whispered. Thomas paused and turned to give the small child a warm smile. 

 

“Anytime, Logan. Anytime.” With that, Thomas exited the bathroom, leaving the two youngest alone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, happy holidays, enjoy this trash~ 
> 
> Feel free to scream at me in the comments! I'll see you all next chapter!
> 
> ~Logan


	5. Clinging Desperately To Winter Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In Which Roman Finally Confesses His Issues, There is More Crying, And We Have Some Plot Development (Finally)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this short? Yes. It's because I'm busy but I don't want to leave you hanging, and honestly, this chapter's mostly just setting up the second part of this story. Enjoy, guys!

“Roman! Give that back!” Thomas sighed and stood up, walking downstairs to see what his children had gotten up to this time. When he entered, he entered to complete and utter chaos. Patton was trying to soothe a sobbing Virgil, who was curled up in his hoodie sobbing like his parents had just died in front of him. Roman was holding a plushie cat over his head, grinning at an extremely pissed off Logan, who was glaring at him in anger. Logan was shaking and appeared to be on the verge of tears, yet Roman wore a smug grin and continued to hold the cat out of Logan’s reach. 

 

“Why? Virgil never said I couldn’t touch it,” Roman replied, smirking as if he had just found a loophole in Logan’s argument. Logan’s cheeks puffed out and he glared even harder, if that was possible. 

 

“He was trying to, you just never gave him the chance!” Logan yelled back, his lisp worse than usual but his stutter not apparent. That seemed to land a bit and Roman lowered his arm a fraction, glancing over at Virgil. 

 

“He’s breaking down over a  _ toy _ ,” Roman answered. That was the instant Thomas decided that he needed to step in unless he wanted to see a bloodbath between his Sides. 

 

“Okay, let’s all settle down. Roman, give it back. Logan, stop yelling at him. Patton, keep doing what you’re doing. Virgil, it’ll be okay, I promise,” Thomas soothed, stepping between Logan and Roman. Logan instantly backed down, eyes widening a bit in horror as the full situation registered, but Roman remained stubborn, clutching the cat a bit tighter. 

 

“Why do I have to do anything? He has other things to squeeze,” he pouted. Logan gritted his teeth, and Thomas placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to both steady and restrain him. 

 

“Roman. It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand it, Virgil needs the cat. Please give it to him,” Thomas murmured, holding out his hand. Roman kept pouting but ultimately handed it over. Thomas beamed and quickly gave it to Logan, who practically dashed over to Virgil and handed him back the cat. Virgil snatched it from Logan and squeezed, murmuring a soft thanks before falling silent again. 

 

Thomas sighed, torn between what to do. This sort of situation had been happening more often, and it was beginning to scare him. Roman was getting more and more aggressive, more and more uncaring of others’ feelings, and Virgil and Logan had become his favourite targets. On the other hand, Virgil and Logan both seemed to be confused on why Roman was acting this way, something that pained Thomas more than he could say. He cared about all of them equally, and he didn’t want to see any of them in any sort of pain. He had to solve this situation, now. 

 

“Roman, could you, me, and Patton all talk? Privately?” Thomas asked. Roman blinked in confusion but nodded. Thomas nodded back before pulling out his phone, shooting off a quick text to Joan asking if they would take Logan and Virgil for a couple of hours. The response was immediate, a  _ Sure dude I’ll be there in 15 minutes _ , and Thomas pocketed his phone, sighing in relief. He didn’t want Logan and Virgil around for this argument. 

 

Joan swung by to grab Logan and Virgil, promising that they’d just have a fun day out in a bookstore and at the movies, and once they left, Thomas settled onto the couch opposite Roman and Patton. “So. Roman, we need to have a chat about your behaviour recently.” 

 

Roman bit his lip. “I’m… I’m sorry…” 

 

“Hey, Roman. Kiddo, it’s okay,” Patton soothed, pulling Roman into a hug. “You’ve made some mistakes, but we can fix this, okay?” Roman nodded shakily, and Thomas smiled gratefully at Patton before turning back to Roman. 

 

“Alright. First off: why are you so mean to Virgil and Logan?” Roman fiddled with his hands a bit before opening his mouth and answering, voice wavering a bit. 

 

“I… I don’t mean to. I get angry because you and Patton care more about them than about me and that hurts for some reason, and then I just want to hurt them, and… yeah.” Thomas blinks, taken aback. He didn’t care more for Logan or Virgil than Roman… did he? 

 

“Ro… they’re literally children right now. They’re going to need more attention,” Patton explained, eyes shining in sad understanding. Roman nodded back, and Thomas’s eyes widened. Oh, oh shit. He had been giving Logan and Virgil more attention than Roman. He’d thought that Roman could handle himself, but… maybe he’d been wrong? 

 

“I know! I know that! I just… feel bad.” Patton pulled him into a hug, and Thomas settled back, mind furiously working as he tried to come up with a solution. He couldn’t just stop paying attention to Logan and Virgil. If Virgil wasn’t having a moment of intense anxiety, something no six year old should ever have to deal with, then Logan was having a meltdown from overstimulation or a moment where he needed something but couldn’t get it. There was no winning in this situation that Thomas could see… unless… 

 

“Roman? I might have a solution. How do you feel about public school?”

* * *

 

“Absolutely not,” Logan insisted the second Thomas brought the suggestion up to him. “I will not be attending school with literal children.” 

 

“Logan. They’re your age. Just… try? Please?” Logan shook his head, crossed his arms, and glared at Thomas. 

 

“They are not my age. Physically, perhaps, but mentally, no. I have seen how intelligent children are treated by their peers, and I do not wish to undergo that treatment. I also refuse to dumb myself down for these children, Thomas. Another reason is Virgil. He will be alone, and I refuse to leave him alone. Unless you are to lie about both his and my ages, we shall be seperated, and I cannot allow that to happen to him. Patton and Roman will be fine, as they are extroverts and in fact miss your high school years, but I do not support this plan, and neither will Virgil once he hears what it is.” 

 

Thomas pinched the bridge of his nose and took a moment to think. Virgil was physically six while Logan was physically nine. Logan could possibly pass as seven or eight based on how small he was, but Virgil absolutely could not pass for a nine year old. But… he could pass as seven. Perhaps… 

 

“Okay, Logan. I’m registering all four of you for school, and that’s the end of that. I understand your concerns, but I was going to talk to the teachers about you and Virgil anyway, so this will just give me more things to talk about. I can register both you and Virgil for first grade-” 

 

“No. No that will be even worse,” Logan interrupted, eyes shining with fear. Thomas sighed. Patton and Roman had seemed excited, but if this was going to be Logan’s reaction… he couldn’t even begin to imagine Virgil’s. 

 

“Okay. Okay okay okay. Patton and Roman really want to go, so I’m not crushing their dreams like that, okay?” Logan nodded, and Thomas relaxed a bit at that. 

 

“I believe it would be beneficial for the two of them, but not for Virgil and myself, if that makes any sense,” Logan softly added, squeezing his arms tighter around himself. Thomas crouched down to look Logan in the eyes and smiled. 

 

“Okay. Let’s talk to Virgil, and if he agrees with you, you two don’t have to go to school. I don’t think any of you need an education, I just want you guys to have a chance to experience childhood for real, if you want it.” Thomas gently reached out to lightly ruffle Logan’s hair, ignoring the indignant squawks that came from Logan. 

 

“Talk to Virgil about what?” Thomas and Logan both froze and slowly turned around to find the darkly-clad anxious Side staring at them in confusion. 

 

“Um… would you want to go to public school?” Thomas asked, figuring it was just better to get this conversation over with, for everyone’s sakes. Virgil froze, paling, violet eyes widening in clear panic. “Okay, no, Virgil, it’s okay, school isn’t required, just calm down.” 

 

“Do… do you need us to go to school?” Virgil whispered. 

 

“No. No I don’t. I don’t need you to go and I don’t want you to go if you don’t want to go, alright?” Thomas released Logan and walked over to Virgil, pulling him into a tight, desperately needed hug. Virgil hugged back, and Thomas felt a warm, wet sensation puddle on his shoulder. “Oh, Virgil, there there, it’ll be okay, I’m sorry I scared you and upset you… Logan, get in here, buddy, you need it too.” Logan hesitantly joined the hug, and Thomas squeezed both kids tighter. “It’s okay, guys. Everything will be fine.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... I'm so, so sorry. Hope you enjoyed? Please tell me your thoughts, and I'll see you soon! 
> 
> ~Logan

**Author's Note:**

> Also, yes, the title of this fic is taken from the song "Coins In a Fountain" by Passenger. Most of the chapter titles will also be from Passenger songs. (I just like listening to Passenger when writing/reading Sanders Sides fic. Sue me.) Thanks for reading this flaming trash pile. I'll try to update at least once a month, but school is starting up again for me soon and I might not have the time. I'll try my best though! 
> 
> Leave your thoughts down in the comments! I'd love to hear from you guys. Also, if you guys wanna see any ships once they (inevitably... maybe... not sure yet) become adults again, let me know! I basically ship everything. 
> 
> Anyway, please leave constructive criticism if you have it! I love concrit; it really helps me grow as a writer. Just please, no flames. Thanks! 
> 
> Thank you again for reading this! And remember: take it easy guys, gals, and nonbinary pals. I love you all! 
> 
> ~Ash


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